Chapter 4: It's all coming back to me now...

*** A little short but I there's 'alot' in it I feel... hope you enjoy***

Dinner ended without a hitch. We had all had a great time and it was beginning to feel like things in my personal life were starting to work out again. I couldn't help but smile as Karrington and I drove back to my house, Marc, Vero, Oksana and Geno followed us in Marc's truck. She had been so much more talkative tonight then she had been when she first arrived and although I knew we still had some major issues to figure out between us, all that mattered to me was the fact that there might be an 'us' again. For that, I was willing to work through anything.

Sana and Geno didn't stay around for long, they were in a rush to get home and we all knew better than to ask questions. Marc, Vero, Karri and I settled in to watch a movie. Somehow the girls suckered us in to watch the Notebook, the only good thing about this was the fact that Karri was squeezed in beside me on the couch.
As the movie began I slowly slid myself closer towards Kerri. Vero, who was to my right, moved so that she was leaning into Marc's lap; her feet nuddging me towards the oposite end of the couch - towards Karrington.

By the end of the movie I had my arm draped around her shoulder and was doing my best to comfort her. She was sobbing uncontrolably, as was Vero; Marc was giving me a confused look.

"They have already seen this movie, they know it's going to make them cry... so why do we always have to watch it?!"

"Cause it's so-so-so good!" Vero sobbed again, clutching onto Marc. We both looked at each other and exploded into laughter. Girls are strange.

Even though it was getting late, Marc and I had the next couple of days off so we decided to watch another movie. I left Marc and Vero in charge of picking one, as Karri and I headed into the kitchen to make more popcorn and refill our drinks.

I looked over at Karri who was still wipping the remainder of tears from her eyes, I couldn't help but shake my head and chuckle as I threw the popcorn into the microwave.

"What's so funny?"

"Girls in general... you and Vero especially."

"How so?"

"Well, you both know you're gonna cry but you still watch the movie."

"Hey, there's nothing wrong with a good sob fest! At least we're better than the girl in the movie." She laughed, grabbing some pop out of the fridge.

"Oh yah? What was wrong with her?"

"Seriously? Well first off, it's her faul that they wasted so many years! She knew where he was the whole time, she just didn't bother to go back."

"She didn't go back because she didn't think that he wanted her anymore... he could have fought for her but he didn't... He could have gone with her, been with her, but he didn't." I was starting to feel heated, this discussion was bringing up memories I wasn't sure I was ready to face.

'Oh please!" She slammed the plastic bottle onto the counter. "She knew exactly where to find him! If she really wanted to be with him then she should have stayed with him and not let anything get in their way! He's the one that never stopped loving her, he spent all those years proving just how much she meant to him by-"

"By what? By building a stupid house that has nothing to do with anything? He chose to stay there, it's not her fault that she had obligations, he could have moved on with her and then none of this ever would have happened!"

"Everything ok in here?" Flower was standing at the door, Vero was peering out from behind his scrawny back. I hadn't realized that we were yelling.

"Oh yah... just peachy!" I was in such a bad mood now that I didn't care if I was being ignorant to Marc. "Just trying to explain to Karrington here that if that stupid guy had of really wanted to be with the person that he supposedly loved... then he would have left that stupid crummy town and moved on with her! She could have taken care of him and they would have gotten to spend all those years together instead of both being miserable."

"Maybe he had his own obligations?! You ever think about that? Maybe he couldn't just up and leave everything behind! Maybe she should have understood that and tried to make it work regardless of the distance."

"Yah right obligations..."

"Yah some people have obligations beyond hockey, but I guess you haven't figured that out yet!"

"Oh right, right I forgot because Cole Harbour is just full of opportunity... wouldn't want to waste it! Hey, could go be with the guy I said I loved but no... think I'll just break his heart and then kick around this shit hole for a bit... sound about right?"

"YOU LEFT SIDNEY! NOT ME! I was right there the whole time, you could have came back at anytime and I would have been right there where you left me!"

"YOU LEFT ME! Don't you turn this into my fault... I had to go Karri! I got drafted! You're the one who decided that I wasn't the one you wanted... you're the one that would rather spend your life in Cole Harbour! You could have come with me!"

I hadn't realized that the yelling had escalated even furthur. Marc and Vero were stilling standing in the doorway looking like they wanted to say something, but weren't sure what that should be. A few feet behind them my parents were visable, both looking stunned.

The sudden apperance of my parents brought around a sense of maturity and I lowered my voice.

"You knew I wanted to be in the NHL, you knew that I was going to get drafted and you always, ALWAYS, said that you would come with me. Then it happened, and you told me you wouldn't go... what am I suppose to do with that Karrington? I wanted to take care of you, always be there for you just like I always wanted you to be there for me. I always thought you loved me like I loved you, but when it came down to it everything you said, every promise you ever made... it was all just words to you. Just words..."

I took a few steps backwards out of the kitchen before turning around and heading out the front door. I didn't stop to the voices calling after me, I didn't stop for a coat or to grab me keys. I slammed the door behind me as I ran down the front the steps. I didn't know where I was going, but I knew I had to leave, as four years of heartache and sleepless nights washed over me.